.it's official.

Christmas season is on its way.
Christmas songs are on the radio.
Including, of course, Last Christmas.

.random thought.

I don't particularly enjoy cooking. I like eating, but I don't generally eat well alone. Which is often. oops.
Basically, I miss the community that meals are supposed to be. So I think subconsciously I've been lazy about food, and eat while reading a book or watching tv, to try to avoid the fact that I am alone.
Yesterday I cooked, and I enjoyed it, and I don't think there was anything different from cooking yesterday vs any other day, except for the fact that I knew I would be eating with friends. And that made it worthwhile.
Conclusion: I think I need a roommate, or at least friends to eat with more frequently.

.grade retreats.

So, I just got back from the last grade retreat of the year. I'm tired, for sure, but also feeling encouraged.

It was great to be up in Muskoka, away from school and the distractions of life back home, and just connect with the students and with God. I certainly had a blast, and I hope they did too!

We had some phenomenal leaders this year, which also helped to make them great experiences.

Pictures to come!

.maritimes.

I am so blessed to live in such a beautiful country! It's so diverse, but everywhere has its own unique beauty.
This summer Roz and I were able to head east for a few days, which was so lovely. Here are a couple of pictures from our trip.

.Montreal.

For what I was up to for 2 weeks this month, go here.

.divine appointment.

This past weekend, my brother and I were driving up to Owen Sound to celebrate my dad's birthday and Father's day.
Not far from town, in a little village along the highway, we passed an unhappy couple. It looked like the man had thrown the woman's things after her and was tearing a strip off her. I told me brother to turn around so we could investigate. We pulled up next to the woman, who was sobbing, and now on the other side of the street than the man, and I asked her if she'd like a ride. She got in, with her bags in tow.
We went a little ways up the road to stop for a drink, and a chance for her to share her story. We also made a plan for what she was going to do next.
I spent a little less than an hour with her, but I'm still hopeful that it made a difference in her life.
I want to be more open to the needs of the people around me, more aware of, and more available to them.
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace...

.springtime.

I am loving today.

The Niagara Youth Network planned an event for today called "Love in Motion" where students from churches all across the Niagara region gather in St. Catharines and then spread throughout the city to serve and love people.  The kick-off took place at a church pretty close to my house, so I decided to walk to the event with my camera, so I could take pictures of some budding trees.

It's amazing how easy it is to meet people on a sunny day armed with nothing but a smile and a camera.
I said hello to a man in a walker, walking a very happy dog.  I chatted with 2 sisters roller-blading in their driveway (the older sister patiently teaching the younger, catching her frequently and picking her back up). Then across the street a toddler on a tricycle with her grandma next to her cheerily repeated "hello" a few dozen times as I waved and returned the greeting.
I paused to take a picture of a tree, and a woman in a scooter interrupted me, asked me to follow her, and showed me to her backyard where a gorgeous cherry tree is blooming. We hunted up and down the sidewalk, looking between houses to find a gorgeous mystery tree she'd caught sight of the other day. We finally caught a glimpse of the brightly coloured tree, but never could determine exactly where it's located or how to get a fuller view of it.

I'm feeling excited at the thought of finally meeting some of my neighbours, after a long winter. I hadn't really let myself plan ahead enough to say that I'd be staying in this apartment for another year; I kind of expected to move, but now I'm feeling like I'm here now, and I should be making the most of this opportunity. I'm looking forward to getting to know more of my neighbours over the coming days and weeks.

.foods and places.

As I was eating Pad Thai for dinner, I began to consider different foods I love that I associate with different places for introducing me to them, or just because they were really good there. St. Catharines and Thai food go together for me...I seem to eat more of it here than in other places I've lived. Which is great, because it's delicious!

The only somewhat unique food I can think of Owen Sound offering to me is schnitzel, but the Schnizelhouse where I used to work no longer exists. The Schnizelhaus in Calgary is quite excellent, though. And the Schnizel in Austria, well, that goes without saying.

Munich: weisswurst. From Yorma's (Your Mama's!) for a euro or two. Wow, we were cheap. But it's delicious!

Amsterdam brings to mind two main foods: Turkish pizza and shoarma. I'm not sure why poffertjes and pannekoeken didn't immediately come to mind, but they count too. Maybe the Turkish pizza being just around the corner from the hostel, and only 2 euros, and shoarmas being everywhere you turned in the city caused them to come to my mind first. Also, Marco and I had a memorable experience while eating shoarma in Vondelpark when a man went into a pond, caught a fish with his bare hands, climbed onto the shore and started beating it on the ground while a crowd gathered around. Weird.

My favourite food from Japan was okonomiyaki, and while I associate it with Japan (we dubbed it Japan's "garbage plate"), I also associate it with Amsterdam's Japanese Pancake House. The dancing fish flakes on top were also awesome, as was the epic boat ride in the canal afterward wherein the motor repeatedly died and Ben attempted to fix it while I paddled towards Harald's. Sadly, when I tried to go back there with Roz and Beth a few years later, they were closed for renovations. Thankfully they were able to get okonomiyaki in Japan this summer, so all is well.

Speaking of garbage plates, I think that's all Rochester has to offer me, which is quite the disappointment because I can't qualify that as good food. I'm not a hater, but considering it can eat through styrofoam and ceiling tiles in a fairly short period of time, I can't recommend it to someone more than once for health's sake.

I think of Vietnamese food when I think of Calgary. Maybe because it was everywhere...2 restaurant options across from the CPCC: one best for Vietnamese subs, and one great for vermicelli. Also, the Vietnamese restaurant in Bowness is awesome, and they're super friendly.
I also think of London Fogs at The House, although they were unable to fill that craving for me the last time I visited. They also have great sandwiches there.
Ooh, and Pulcinella's pizza (and their nutella dessert pizza deliciousness thing!!).

Pesto. Cinque Terre. Specifically, Rio Maggiore. Particularly from the grocery store at the bottom of the hill on the left-hand side right before the entrance to the tunnel leading to the train station area. Best. Pesto. Ever.

Well, although this list is far from exhaustive, that was the end of my Pad Thai (a very popular dish!) and thus the end of my food reminiscences. What are some of your food/place associations?

.Boston.

Roz and I recently visited BethL in Boston (well, Cambridge technically). It was a great visit, and awesome to catch up with Beth, and I look forward to going back again someday.
Boston and Cambridge are great cities to walk around, plus the subway is really convenient. We were a little slowed by Roz's crutches, but I think it was nice because it was more relaxing. Also: Roz's arms are super buff from crutching around everywhere. And! her knee is getting better.
I think I'm going to let some pictures tell stories for themselves.

.glencoe.

This weekend Jess invited a few of us to her parents' place in Glencoe.  It was such a lovely mini retreat!
The weather cleared up for us to drive on Friday night and we arrived safely at the gorgeous farmhouse with the ground gracefully covered in snow.
We sang hymns, played games, watched a movie, visited the sheep and horses in the barn, and...went cross country skiing! (Except for poor Roz who couldn't join us for that part because she's still recovering from being run into and knocked out on the slopes last week.)
The weather was perfect. Temperatures hovered around zero and snow gently fell as we skied, but the snow started to get pretty sticky the second hour in. I paused fairly frequently to snap some photos, so I thought I'd show a few here.

 singing hymns around the piano

 Rach demonstrates her speed-skater moves

 the snow gently falling, fast, oh fast...

 look at 'em go!

 a short snack break

 back on the trail!

 posing with the sign...we went on Huron trail (but took a short cut)

 Rach "attacks" Julie with a pitchfork!

 Rach works up the nerve to pet a (very soft, cushy) sheep!

 Roz with the horses

 checking out the bald spot on the sheep's neck

 Jess the teacher explaining the bald spot

 Roz is super excited that she can cross her legs!!

 Rachel "bad boy" Peters

the barn

.sight restored.

I recently had laser eye surgery.  I think about what they did to my eyes 2 days ago, and it kind of freaks me out.  But it's also ridiculously cool.  Because I now have 20/20 vision! After 18ish years of having to wear glasses/contacts, now I can simply see.

Here's a picture of what my eyes look like now, as they're healing (and slightly bruised).  Be forewarned: my brother was really grossed out.  I didn't know what they looked like cuz I hadn't looked in the mirror yet, but I guess I can understand why he didn't want me to look at him directly, haha.

For the first 2 nights I had to wear these eye shields so I wouldn't accidentally rub my eyes.  They're kind of weird goggly things, and basically just make me laugh at myself.

.O Holy Night.

This is my favourite Christmas carol.  The third verse, especially, gets me excited.  This is the Christ whose birth we are celebrating!  The one whose law is love, whose gospel is peace, who is setting slaves free, and who causes all oppression to cease, who calls his people to follow this example.

O holy night! The stars are brightly shining,

It is the night of our dear Saviour's birth.

Long lay the world in sin and error pining,

'Til He appear'd and the soul felt its worth.

A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,

For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.

Fall on your knees! O hear the angels' voices!

O night divine, O night when Christ was born;

O night divine, O night, O night Divine.

Led by the light of Faith serenely beaming,

With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.

So led by light of a star sweetly gleaming,

Here come the wise men from Orient land.

The King of Kings lay thus in lowly manger;

In all our trials born to be our friend.

He knows our need, to our weakness is no stranger,

Behold your King! Before Him lowly bend!

Behold your King, Before Him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another;

His law is love and His gospel is peace.

Chains shall He break for the slave is our brother;

And in His name all oppression shall cease.

Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,

Let all within us praise His holy name.

Christ is the Lord! O praise His Name forever,

His power and glory evermore proclaim.

His power and glory evermore proclaim.

.gefeliciteerd.

my car just turned 100,000!

.cookie fiasco.

A little while ago I promised some students I'd bake them cookies for the next day.  They requested that they be nut free (one of them had an allergy) and flour-free (which I said I was unable to accommodate).
That evening I debated between chocolate chip cookies and molasses cookies, but decided on chocolate chip, because everyone loves those, right?
I turned the oven on to preheat while i mixed the dough.  Halfway through, I discovered that I'd run out of vanilla.  I debated over what to do, and decided that almond extract would probably be a suitable substitute.  Right after I added it, I remembered: nut allergy!
I decided I'd end up having make the molasses cookies too, after all.
I went to put the first tray of cookies in the oven and discovered that it was still cold.  My oven doesn't work.  So, I turned on my toaster oven, transferred some of the cookies to the toaster oven tray, and began the slow process of baking cookies in a small space.  It takes a long time to bake cookies when you can only put 9 in at a time.
While those trays were baking, I made the molasses cookies.
In the end, they all turned out pretty well and disaster was averted.  In any case, they were all gone by the end of the next day.

.invisible people.

In recent years I've spent a lot of time talking about and attempting to live out a core value of mine: that human life is valuable.
In Amsterdam our cleaner ministry provided us with many opportunities to connect with people who may otherwise have had nowhere else to sleep and no food to eat. It was a joy to get to know their stories and hear how they came to be part of the Shelter community, and also to provide a place for them to get back on their feet.  My heart began to be transformed to love those to whom I previously paid little attention.
In my time at the CPCC we showed that we valued life with our goal of making abortions unnecessary, valuing the life of the unborn.  At the same time, we valued the lives of the women and men who came into our Centre, helping them as best we could.
At Awaken, my small group was part of a community supper in Bowness, and we had the opportunity to get to know a number of people in the neighbourhood over dinner.  It was wonderful to connect with these people there, but to also bump into them outside of this context and develop some friendships.  These are people who are largely ignored (let's be honest; how often do you really take the time to stop and chat with whoever you pass on the street? it just doesn't happen, no matter who it is.) but who have valuable stories to share.
It's interesting, not to mention heartbreaking, to read studies that show that homeless people and drug addicts don't even register as people in our brains; we recognize them as objects.  And yet these are people who deserve to be treated with care and love, the same as anyone else, if not more-so.  I can imagine how desperately they would long for a kind human touch, to be looked upon as someone who is valued.  Instead they're spat upon, beaten, ignored.
As a Christian, I need to check myself.  Am I noticing the "invisible" people around me?  Am I sharing a kind word with them, offering them a cup of coffee, a chance to chat.  Or am I too busy to take the time to do more than smile and say hello.
Jesus reminds us that whatever we do for the least of these, we do for him.
One of the ways I'm trying to help the least of these is by writing my MP to encourage the government to stop taking legal action against InSite, Vancouver's safe injection site.  I believe that it is a fundamental right of Canadians to receive healthcare, and at InSite they receive care, kindness, and are given dignity as humans.  Additionally, there are many benefits to InSite on financial and harm-reduction levels that our government should appreciate, rather than waste our money trying to shut down a program that is a positive addition to many otherwise dark and hopeless lives.
If you want to read some research, or hear from the perspective of a Christian nurse working at InSite, check out my friend Meera's blog, as well as this site.
Please write your MP and help change our government's mind.

.faith journey.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
~Hebrews 11:1

The timeline on this story probably goes back before December, but that's where I'm choosing to begin.

When I was home for Christmas, I started telling people I was interested in a job at Eden in their Spiritual Life Department.  This was an odd thing for me to do for a few reasons.  One: I was already settled at a great job in Calgary.  Two: there was no posting for a job at Eden in the SLD.  But as I prayed, I sensed great confirmation that this was where I should (at the very least) apply.

So, in March I sent in my resume and a cover letter, only to be informed that there were no positions available at that time.

As I continued to pray, I still sensed that my time at the Centre would be coming to a close and I should pursue other possibilities.  I began to look for jobs that were similar to the SLD, and one by one, every door was slammed shut.

I prayed more.  I believe that in life there are many choices we can make and God will bless us with either one.  I believe that if I had stayed at the Centre, God would have continued to bless me there (not that he would have to...just that in this particular situation it wasn't a clear "right or wrong").  But I also felt somewhat discontent about staying there, and believe that God was challenging me to trust him, to take a step of faith and see what would happen.

So I did.

I notified my bosses and coworkers that I would be leaving the Centre at the end of the school year.  They responded so positively; they weren't angry at me for leaving them, they were thankful for the large amount of notice I gave, they encouraged me in my search for new work, and, most importantly, they prayed that God would provide a job that would be the right fit for me.

As my time in Calgary began to draw to a close and doors were repeatedly slammed in my face, I began to dread the inevitable questions: "Where are you moving to? What will you be doing?"

I had no answers.  I didn't know where I'd end up.  I didn't know what I'd end up doing.  But I always rested assured of who God is.  I reminded myself frequently that God has shown himself to be kind and loving; he is not mean.  He would not tear me out of one place of ministry and then not provide another and then laugh at my misfortune.  He is a provider.  And I chose to trust that he would provide for me in this situation too.

I won't lie.  There were moments in days when my faith would waver.  When the reality of moving across the country to end up who-knows-where doing who-knows-what seemed a bit overwhelming.  But I continued to take it to God in prayer and let it go.  I refused to let myself be bogged down for long.  (Though I'm sure my friends can attest to a few "freak out" moments.)

Not too long after I was back in Ontario, I was enjoying a beautiful afternoon at the beach.  That day, I kind of gave up.  I told God that I felt like I had exhausted every possibility of finding a job that seemed to fit with the gifts he's given me and the calling I've felt on my life.  I told him that I was giving up on looking for work; I didn't know what else to do, where else to apply.  When I got back later that afternoon there was an email waiting for me inviting me to interview for the position at Eden.

I hadn't even realized that a position had become available, but as soon as I read that email I laughed.  I thought, 'Ok, God.  I get it.  Thank you.'  I knew that this was my answer, and he was being faithful to my obedience in following him into the mystery.

I am so blessed.

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."
~Hebrews 11:6

.road trip!.

During the Canada Day long weekend, Kim had a few days off and agreed to accompany me on my cross-country move back to Ontario.  We crossed through 4 provinces and 4 states in 3 days, and have some stories and pictures to prove it.
Day 1:
We left Calgary for Winnipeg.  Thankfully, although we saw evidence of the flooding, the highway had reopened by the time we needed to go through.

We discovered that Swift Current may possibly be one of the last places in Canada that we'd actually want to live.  We grabbed some lunch at their local "Wheatland Mall" and realized that we did not fit in.  (That was a common theme of much of the trip.)

The drivers in Saskatchewan were exceptionally bad.  5 or 6 times various transport truck drivers decided to cross over a few lanes of oncoming traffic travelling at 120 km/hr and then stop and simply block the lanes before turning left.  Seriously?  The first time we just thought it was a random incident of a bad driver, but it kept happening again and again and again!
The best part about Saskatchewan was we stopped for a few minutes in Regina and I got to see Mel!  YAY!  Miss you, Mel.

From the little I've seen of Saskatchewan and Manitoba, I like Manitoba better.  It's a bit more interesting to look at.  More trees.  More lakes.  MORE MOSQUITOES.  Ok, that part, I'm not such a huge fan.
We stayed just outside of Winnipeg the first time, with Kim's friend Kurtis who just bought a farm.  And some goats.
Day 2:
We headed to Otterburne before crossing the border, because I couldn't imagine coming so close and then not seeing the school from which I graduated.  (Seeing the entire campus took less than a minute, with the foot hovering the brakes.)

On our way there, we were caught in the middle of a wicked storm.  I do mean wicked.  I slowed down significantly because the rain was so heavy it was difficult to see far ahead.  At one point we saw headlights coming towards us, then lightning strike, and the headlights go out.  We pulled over.  When we continued, we wanted to see if the people in the car were ok, but when we passed where the car had been...there was no car!  So we might have witnessed a car being incinerated by lightning.  (Or, truthfully, we don't have a clue what actually happened.)
By the time we got to Otterburne we had passed the storm, and the rest of our drive was sunny, hot, and much less buggy.

 We breezed through the border into North Dakota, where we also did not fit, then continued on to Minnesota.  Guess what?  We didn't fit in there either.

But we did meet a giant roadside fish!

When we were in Duluth we were looking for a restaurant.  Kim had been telling me about an American chain where they have a cheap salad buffet, and you can get all kinds of all-you-can-eat salads, and it sounded so delicious, and we were quite disappointed when the guy at the gas station had never even heard of it.  I then asked a ridiculous question: do you have any restaurants with salad buffets?  Kim almost died choking back her laughter.  Note to self: never ask a vegetarian question in Minnesota.  We ended up going to a local restaurant whose owners buy local food, and it was both affordable and delicious. 
Continuing on to Wisconsin we took photos at a cheese store, which sadly wasn't open, and drove until we reached some random town along Lake Superior and found a cheap motel.

Day 3:
Head out early!  Crossed into Michigan.  We went through a town called Christmas.  It had a giant Santa.

It was a pretty drive.  We discovered a lot of Michigonians(?) are Lutheran.  Or at least, Lutheran churches are most prevalent in the midwest.  It felt like we were in Michigan for a long time, but the lakes and trees and winding road kept it interesting.
And then finally we were at the border! 

A rude shock upon arriving in Sault St. Marie: gas was $1.10/L!  We pressed on, hoping to reach South Baymouth before the last ferry took off for Tobermory.  We also discovered a town called Spanish, and then shortly thereafter, a town called Espanola.  (I am told that because it doesn't have the ~ over the n, you don't pronounce it the Spanish way, but still. Kind of funny.)
Someday I may go back to Manitoulin Island and explore or go for a day hike or something (except the ferry is rather expensive, so maybe for more than a day.  Or not drive over.) because it was pretty, but we were rushing to make the ferry.  Kim had doubts.  I was determined.  And.  We made it!  Barely.  But we made it.
We got some supper on the Chi Cheemaun and tried to nap a bit.  But it was COLD.  When we got off the boat, my gas tank was hovering on empty, but every gas station we passed was closed; I guess pay-at-the-pump hasn't made it that far.  But, we made it home (whew) and my parents did not wake up with our arrival (around 1:30am).  Which means, they shrieked (read: mom shrieked) upon discovering me the next morning.
Day 4:

The next day we (mostly just Kim, actually) slept in and then I took her around town and to Sauble Beach.  Oh, how I had missed that beach!

We also stopped by Inglis Falls briefly, and headed to the drive-in for a couple of shows, since Kim hadn't been to a drive-in movie before.
Day 5:
We went to church, had lunch, then I drove Kim to the airport to fly back to Calgary.  I went to my sister's for a bit, and then drove back to my parents' place.
And the sadness hit me and I cried.
Thankfully, Meera called me and cheered me up with talk of home.  (I say "home" very loosely, because I don't really know where "home" is...but at that moment, "home" was Calgary.)