summer? what's that?

We're all sitting in our house, shivering, with sweaters on. So Julie turns on the heat (which I was unaware of, since I was being a good little girl and reading my book for class) and I notice that my room smells like something is burning. Moments later, the smoke detector is going off and we're following our noses around the house trying to find the source of smoke. We immediately assume that it's the dryer, but it's not turned on. The washer is certainly not smoking. I finally convince everyone that the smell really is coming from my room, but I don't know where it's coming from. I go to turn off my power cord in case something is randomly being fried when I notice hot air blowing out my vent and a strong smell coming with it. Burning dust. So now the heat is off, my room still smells, and the mystery is solved. It's going to be a long winter...

babysitting

I just got back from babysitting next door. Lynn called a while ago asking me to babysit her 7 year old twin girls for an hour while she went to the doctor due to a bladder infection (which she proceeded to describe to me for the next few minutes). Obviously I couldn't not refuse the request of a woman in such intense pain, and headed to the other side of the duplex.
Knowing how to french braid is a handy skill, I've discovered. After braiding Katie and Holly's hair they decided to braid mine...yeah...oops, it fell out!
The girls showed me their birds (very cute) and then Katie read me Green Eggs and Ham while Holly somehow found a clean tampon and thought it was a mouse to make a craft with? Then I helped Holly write in her journal (first entry ever) and then played puppy with Katie. Then we played "Perfection" and then Lynn returned and she chatted with me about how the people who lived here before us were awful and almost set the building on fire. Entertaining story the first time around.
So yup, fun times babysitting...I've discovered I'm not very good at being a dog anymore.

psalm 16

...You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing...

I will praise the LORD, who counsels me;

even at night my heart instructs me.

I have set the LROD always before me.

Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

Therefore, my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;

my body will also rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay.

You have made known to me the path of life;

you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

irony

Chicken clubs have officially struck out and are out of the game. The other night Merissa and Steph both ordered them from Montana's, and not only were they bland, Steph almost choked on a bone. Yesterday when we were at Swiss Chalet I thought the chicken club sounded tasty and delicious, so I ordered it. It was bland, and since (I know, I'm weird) I'm not a fan of swiss chalet bbq sauce, I added the ever-so-flavourful mayo for my tastebuds' delight. It worked, the wrap was successfully enjoyed and life went on. Until 4:00 this morning when I woke up in pain. I proceeded to the bathroom where the contents of my stomach found their way back up through my mouth. And kept coming and kept coming and kept coming. So not pleasant. I hate food poisoning. So at 4:15 when the puking finally ceased (I wasn't kidding about the "and kept coming" part) I tried to flush the toilet, and it would not flush. I clogged it with puke. Sick! And now I don't feel like telling the rest of the story because details aren't pleasant and I've already forced this unpleasant experience on you too much. Oh yeah, I was gonna explain why it was ironic, sorta. Only because we had been talking about food poisoning at dinner earlier while I was eating said chicken club wrap. Ok, enough of the gross story. I'm feeling a lot better now by the way. Not 100% but much improved.

remnants of dutch culture in me

While there are no Albert Heijn's close by, there is a Safeway. And since there are 6 of us living here with 1 fridge I find myself heading there much more frequently. No, not quite the Dutch daily visit, but every other day or so I'll stop by. When I had class I would stop in (since my bus dropped me off right there) and get fresh fruit daily. Heel leuk. Also, I have successfully passed on my cheesy pancake addiction to my housemates and Stawan. And since gouda is the cheapest cheese at Safeway...guess what kind I've been eating? I think the only other "Dutch" thing I do is speak it a little because Merissa is South African and she speaks Afrikaans so we can mostly communicate to each other, which is quite fun.
P.S. I'm not sure why I linked so many things. Just kinda felt like it. The end.

two gentlemen of verona

Merissa and I went to Shakespeare in the Park the other day and saw Two Gentlemen of Verona which was a good play, well performed and such. But we were quite annoyed with the end! Neither of us had read it before, so we weren't sure what to expect. Basic story: Two guys, Proteus and Valentine, are in love with two girls, Julia and Silvia. Then Proteus decides he's in love with Silvia as well and gets his best friend Valentine banished so he can snag Silvia even though he's already promised to Julia. Julia comes to visit as a surprise to Proteus, only she's disguised as a boy, Sebastian. Sebastian and Silvia sort of become friends because Silvia keeps telling Proteus to go back to Julia. He keeps going after Silvia, and tries to rape her until Valentine steps in and stops him. Then Valentine ends up with Silvia, and Julia takes Proteus back. After watching what he was trying to do with Silvia. So the end is pretty frustrating. But Merissa and I were talking about how it seems like that's probably true a lot. And that's really sad, that these girls keep taking back these guys who are jerks, who don't even apologize for being jerks, and pretend that nothing happened. I don't know if that's good forgiveness or just stupidity. Anyways, that's my summary of the play; I'd recommend King Lear. It's much better.

this weekend

On Saturday Julie Nicole and I made a picnic and went to Shakespeare in the Park. It was so well done; definitely worth the $10 donation. Then we walked down to the river and sat there skipping stones and chatting for a few hours. It was such a nice, relaxing Saturday, spending no time with school stuff! I also got this weird sunburn from my shirt and my hair. But I think it's getting better already, which is nice because I really hate tan lines. I know, I'm a girl, haha.
Saturday night Ashley (from my class) drove Merissa (one of my housemates) and me to church and it was really good. Dave Brotherton spoke, so that was neat. And I'm excited because I finally understand the hot/cold thing. Beautiful.
Yesterday I got up early to help Nicole set up at her church and then she had worship team practice and then it was the service. I went to a Nazarene church in Rochester for a year, but it was pretty different from this one. This one was much more traditional. Which is fine, because I like traditional every once in a while. There's something very beautiful about everyone speaking in unison.
Then we went to the Rockies! Which was wonderful because I'd never even seen them before. We went to Kananaskis and hiked to Troll Falls and took a lot of pictures and had water/rock fights and an overall good time. Then we went to some campground on Upper Lake (amazingly creative naming job) and built a raging fire (thanks to Nicole the pyro) and popped popcorn and made s'mores and generally ate too much junk food. It was so beautiful there, with the sun setting over the mountains. Yes, I took pictures of it as well. I just sat on a rock at the water for a long time enjoying the beauty. God is really amazing.
Then 5 of the 6 of us housemates had a bonding experience and an intense time with the Lord. I'm really glad we did, because I hate cushy Christianity, and we got to see God at work.
Anyways, it's a beautiful day out again! and so I'm going to do my school work outside where I can enjoy it. Doei!

bus friends

So I haven't really made any bus buddies yet. There was a lady I talked to a few times, but she hasn't been at the bus stop this week. There's another lady who always gets on and off the bus in the mornings with me, but the bus is pretty full and I don't consider it to be the most opportune moment to become friends with someone when, as my prof puts it, your bumper is bumping their bumper. But this afternoon I practised my listening skills with two guys talking about sweat and beer. Great topics, I know, but I discovered that while the one makes money simply to drink it away, the other tries to please "his woman". Also, he makes bannisters and when he works on "cheap houses, only 8 million or so" that aren't finished yet (without a roof, etc.) in the winter his glue freezes and he needs heaters to blow on him. Interesting, eh? Ah well, they wished me a nice weekend and I returned the sentiment as I stepped off the bus.
A couple houses down from mine a little boy was playing with his grandpa. They had some cool rocket toy thing that attached to the hose and shot up like a geyser. Pretty cool. I wanted to join them, but resisted the urge and restricted myself to simply saying hello.
I finished my second class today. Well, I still have papers to write (only one done so far) and more books to read, but all the in class stuff is done. And we were told we're not allowed to think about any school stuff this weekend. I'm down with that! I'm looking forward to the break. Although today was really good, and I got to "counsel" someone which was a neat experience. Got some good feedback also, so that was helpful. Oh the laughter and tears we've shared together in that classroom...it's pretty crazy how close you get to a group of 18 people over the course of 2 weeks. People discussed real situation that they're going through and it was intense. Really neat though. Ok, now to begin my weekend! Buh Bye computer!

the benjamin gate

Need

The fear I carry in my heart
The things that change and turn around me
What is it that I become?
What is it that it's all undone?
I long to be close to You
So close I disappear into You
Doesn't matter what I try and do
You show me what is real and true
The person that I hope to be
Not bound by anyone's opinion
A person with history
Moving to my destiny

Whatever I'm needing
Whatever I'm feeling
I give up to You
I give up to You

You hold me tight in Your hand
That's when I feel the peace that I crave
You make me brave to withstand
You take me through this barren land
God I hear You speak so clear
Your words melt away my fear
Even when I'm far -
You are near
Your love will never disappear

That's when I lose myself in You...

indecisive

Do you ever feel like you don't know what to write or just don't feel like blogging, but you do it anyways? That's me right now.
All the intensity of last week's class (emotion-wise) is gone. There's actually time to think now, without being so overwhelmed. But somehow, I liked that week better. Maybe it was because God was so clearly at work in us. But then again, it was so intense that I don't know if I could handle that two weeks in a row, so this week is a nice break. Not like it's a break from God. On the contrary, I have more time this week (since I'm not reading Egan, YAY) to spend with him. But in class it's more practical (which makes sense, since it's a practicum) and not as spiritual. It certainly doesn't neglect the spiritual though. Anyways, I'm enjoying this class as well, and it's good practice and I'm learning a lot.
Last night Ashley (one of my classmates...also just moved out here from Ontario) and I went to church. Centre Street church has some 20s and 30s thing called Axis and we figured we'd check it out. Of course we show up on a "sex talk" night, which actually made me curious to see how different it would be from the high school sex talks. And, surprise, they played a video of Tim Bergmann speaking. Haha, so it was kinda fun, cuz I love his sermons. I started to fall asleep during our discussion...I couldn't stop the yawns. It wasn't a bad discussion or anything, just nothing really new. Whatever. Oh, and I randomly saw Steve Adam's brother Jeremy there. So that was kinda cool, even though I'm pretty positive he has no clue who I am, haha.
I miss the Shelter tonight. It would be cool to work another shift and hang out with those people again. But it's ok. I had good closure and I know my time there is over. It's nice to have such good memories, but I do miss people. I think that's the hardest thing about moving from one place to another, as much as I enjoy it. You get attached and then detached and the reattached to people.
Well, although I don't have to read Egan anymore, I do need to finish my paper on him. So I guess I'll go do that...

today

Ahh, Saturday.
Started off...reading Egan. Currently the bane of my existence. Still not quite done, but very close.
I took a break and went to the Taste of Calgary with Julie, which was delicious and fun. It was nice to stop being responsible and studious for a few hours too.
Then, of course, I came back to read more Egan. Also I took a nap. And then read some more.
Then I tried to go to church, haha. I did make it, eventually. Only took 2 hours. I took a bus then a train then a bus then I got off at the wrong spot so I just walked. Good thing I brough my map with me, cuz otherwise I'd probably still be wondering around somewhere. Or reading Egan, haha (I brought him along and read on the train). I got to see the Bergmann's though. So that was really cool. Chatted with Alex a bit, and Tanner remembered me (but Emily didn't. sad story.). My how those kids have grown! Riis is 4 (I guess, since they moved 4 years ago) and I haven't seen him since he was a newborn. Ridiculous. So I got my quota of hugs for the day which was very nice, and Tim prayed with me which was also really cool. God has been blessing my time in Calgary already a lot. And I didn't have to fight with public transportation on the way home because I got a ride from "scary" Joel. Apparently he wanted to scare me, but it didn't work. In any case, I am thankful to meet more people and also thankful that knowing them saves me from public transportation, haha.
So now I am taking a little break from, you guessed it, Egan, and writing a blog. Only I don't have much more to say so I guess I'll see what Egan has in store for me, haha.
Also, happy birthday to my bro, and congrats to Suz and Gary!

I'm still here

I know, I haven't blogged in a while (relative to myself of course), but it's true that I've been really busy! I was talking to Dave last night about the course I'm currently taking (9-4 every day then hours of reading at night. not much time to blog, sorry) and he wants me to post all about it so he can learn what I'm learning. Well, that's not going to happen, but I'll share highlights now and then I'm sure.
It's been so good to be taking this class, and I love how centred it is around God. We start off each day with a devotion, combining art and scripture and our own experiences. Really powerful. And we use Scripture all throughout the class, not just a separate thing at the beginning. Today in the middle of class we burst out into song singing, "We fall down, we lay our crowns at the feet of Jesus. The greatness of his mercy and love, at the feet of Jesus. We cry holy, holy, holy, we cry holy, holy, holy, we cry holy, holy, holy is the Lamb!" I love it. How many other grad classes would do that? So along with knowing God more we're learning a lot about ourselves. Which is a lot to digest and I wish there was more time, haha. But it is really good and I am so convinced that this is where I'm supposed to be.
Ok, so one passage from today (actually Dave, this kind of adds on to our conversation about spiritual beings with human experiences vs human beings with spiritual experiences) is 2 Cor. 5:1-10. We talked about a number of different passages actually, and how they answer the Psalm 8:4 question of "what is man that You are mindful of him?"
So here it is:
Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.
Tehrefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.

Side story. I was waiting this afternoon at my bus stop (probably there will be a rant in the near future about public transportation in Calgary) along with a fairly large crowd of people. And a car zooms around the corner up on the sidewalk going at least 40 km/hr and people are jumping out of the way (I personally jumped onto the street after briefly noting there were no cars coming) and it was ramming into buildings and a few people. There were chunks of marble from the buildings on the ground. Large chunks. It was insane. I talked with a man who had been hit in the left hip because he couldn't get out of the way fast enough and he landed on his right arm. One of his shoes was missing (I never could find it) but other than a little bleeding and pain and being shaken up he seemed pretty ok. Some other people looked like they weren't hit at all, but were going into hysterics because of shock and stuff. It was cool how everyone instantly checked to see if others were ok. I asked if anyone had checked to see if the driver was ok, but there seemed to be a crowd around the car so none of the people around me knew. We guessed that he'd had a heart attack or something, but when I went by on the bus he looked completely fine as he talked to the police. I guess I'll have to watch the news tonight to see what they say. Maybe he was drunk or something, I don't know. So that was the unwanted adventure of the day!
Now I've gotta keep reading...

i'm in calgary!

Well...in the past few days I moved from 34 degree weather (which felt like more than 40 with humidity) to 12 degree weather. And I bought and assembled (with my mom) a dresser, bed, desk, chair, and bookshelves. Not bad, I think. And we went to Red Deer yesterday to visit my mom's old friend from Uni. Oh, and we saw Dave Brotherton at the school yesterday, so that was kinda fun. Welp, I think that's all for now. Don't feel like sitting at a computer. Doei!